Poems by Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

NEARING CHILE...

2012-01-30T22:43:00.000-08:00

I feel you coming

that moment...

when I see the sun

appear over the mountains

as when I was a child.....

That moment

when I step on my land

and smell the aroma....

When I look at the faces of everyone

and see my race, my eyes, my smile....

That moment

when I embrace

those I love

when I laugh

when I call my friends

when I drive thru my city....

When I listen to my music

when I am called

to tea time!!

I feel you near....

LIKE A CONDOR...

2012-01-30T22:31:00.000-08:00

I want to fly like a condor...free

with the blue sky around me

looking at the beauty of my land.....

Gliding silently

among the mountains

clear lakes reflecting me

landing on the hilltops

feeling the wind caressing me

and with ancient eyes

look at the dawn....

A MIDSUMMER'S NIGHT ...

2012-01-30T22:03:00.000-08:00

A midsummer's night

I will climb up

looking from up high

at Santiago's lights....

I will sit in the dark

to fill my pupils

with the beauty

of her nights.....

Rivers of golden lights

cross you

my hometown....

Place full of memories

of joys and sorrows

back today

to see you

come and wait for me.....

I am almost there

and soon we

will be together....

IT IS A MATTER OF SKIN...

2011-12-21T15:22:00.000-08:00

Years pass ... the outside changes
our eyes sink, hide
after all they saw ...
Our mouth, slowly loses the
smile but we do not know
the rictus of age one day surprise us ...
Changed on the outside ...
in our hair, they appear
silver threads
and our walk ...slows ...
The tenderness of the grandchildren
wards off loneliness, protects us
and we feel safe there, as
grandmothers, and without needing
to be more than that ...
But fate is playful
has plans of it's own
Our plans are not important...
And suddenly you're a guitar
in the hands of a virtuoso
and sing again
beautiful, young, free
with the melody of love
enveloping you....
and fully feel the kiss of desire
returning to your skin ....

A KISS IN THE WIND...

2011-12-21T15:15:00.000-08:00

Last night, I went out to the terrace .. .. it was cold ...
the stars shone beautiful in the night sky...
my warm breath you could see in the air
and I fell in love with Venus ....
I thought of you .. so far away from me
sleeping in your warm summer night
oblivious to my thoughts ...
And here, in the north of the old planet
with snow on the pines that surround
the island ... you sent you a kiss
floating in the wind going south ....

Copyright 2011 Sonia Paz Baronvine

LOVING

2011-11-28T23:43:00.000-08:00

I close my eyes and smile, remembering your words,

even feeling your breath on my skin....

As a sandy path, soft and warm

through me up to the sea

you were filled by my

seaside scent.....

Your hands touched me in the distance,

stroking my body,

discovering my secrets...

And your lips kissed me thru time

long and sweet kisses

full of tenderness.....

Slowly without words

gazing each other

we danced the magic

music of love......

Your taste and mine

your skin and mine

your sighs and mine

in the eternal night

never to be forgotten....

You and I

through the threshold

holding hands

smiling at the sunset

awaiting us.....

I NEED YOU NEAR...

2011-11-28T23:24:00.000-08:00

I need you near

your words

are recorded in my mind

I repeat them while

I think of you...so far away...

While you sleep

in the south of the old planet

I smile thinking

of that sunset we

have planned...

How it will be to gaze at you

how our first hug will feel

how it will be when we laugh

when we sing

when we share so many

things we yearn to tell....

We have lived so much lile

We have been in the same places

but in a different time....

It saddens me to know you so late in life

but I know how

valuable things

take time in arrive...

Our friendship is cute

we communicate

in this virtual world

slowly opening

the door we had closed

tired of sorrows

thinking it would be

forever....

But the surprising love

unexpected arrival

is like spring

appears one morning

full of flowers

to remind us

there is hope yet.....

Thank you my sweet friend

for the beautiful moments

you have given me.....

YOUR VOICE IN THE MEMORY

2011-09-29T22:21:00.000-07:00

I remember you laughing, with that warm, frank smile

your big brother's sweet voice, teaching me

when I sat to watch you play guitar

how easy was for you to compose those melodies

that I will never forget ....

Such tender eyes, watching the children

the tenderness of your hugs to the old ladies

who came to greet you ..

walking surrounded by humble people

everyone wanted to touch you ...

It was the Chilean people

it was your beloved people

those women who bake the bread

those who rise at dawn

those men who toil under the sun

sitting down to lunch under the trees

singing your songs ...

Those children, tan skin,with black olive eyes smiling

Pachi Here is our future, you used to tell me

caressing their heads as you walked by ..

How often three of us, you, Richard and I

went to Valparaiso to sing, touring roads and streets

of those steep hills in your truck ....

how we laughed thinking" what if the breaks fail"..

somewhere, going down those streets...

They were happy years, my friend

were days of music, brotherhood

where we sat to play guitar

surrounded by ponchos and flutes

Now that you are gone

to sing through the universe,

your music still lives

in all of us who know you, but also in many more who follow your example....

Poem for my friend Victor Jara

PINCOYA

2011-06-02T11:20:00.000-07:00

Pincoya

In the night, when everyone sleeps
you come silently from the water
shaking your algae hair
and with your phosphorescent eyes
of nocturnal sea..you look at the stars....

Emerging from the water
naked, your golden skin
reflects the moonlight
and when you inhale the
marine air, magically you
transform into a woman..

Leaving footprints on the cold sand
you walk slowly, unhurried...
followed by fireflies
that cling to your hair
you shine in the dark....

And gently, smiling
you sing
a sweet melody
Pincoya turns and turns
dancing under the
moonlight....

Copyright © Sonia Paz Baronvine

SPRING IS NEAR...

2011-02-13T19:19:00.000-08:00

Walking thru the park..
holding my little grandson's hand
I see the blooming pink trees
and he points at the pretty flowers..

Spring is near,
I can feel it in the scent
that surrounds us...

As I hold him in my arms
the wind blows some
petals on my hair,
and I delight with his giggle..

Sonia Paz Baronvine

WINTER'S WIND

2009-12-15T13:19:00.000-08:00

Driving in the rain
at night..
blurred colorful lights pass me by
holiday leftover
from diehard neighbors....

It is winter in Central California
and I am cold, I also cry easily
lately... because my son is sick...

It is hard to keep a cheerful face
when inside of me I have
this heavy heart...

You my oldest son,
once bright, witty, strong
now sad, sarcastic, weak
the cancer hurting you,
the chemo poisoning you,

And me...
praying to all the goddesses
in the middle of the park
away from everyone
crying under the rain
screaming to the winter's
wind to ask mother earth
to heal you...

My tears are salty
they fall copiously
from my tired eyes
down to my neck
as I search the stars
for an answer.....

HALLOWEEN AGAIN...

2009-10-27T16:12:00.000-07:00

After the rain, my grandson and I
walk holding hands among the pumpkins
pointing at this one and that one..
He runs up and down the patch, his eyes sparkling,
filled with joy..
Memories of choosing pumpkins long time ago,
with his mom at his age, come back to me....
Halloween Again...
In the Autumn afternoon I feel the air brisk,
the aroma of wet earth,
while he chooses one and insists on carrying it himself...
Holding his treasure, we walk, he smiles at me, with rosy cheeks,

and tells me how we will carve it and place a candle inside
Halloween Again....
Time for costumes and candy, red apples and dry corn
As we drive away, he tells me,
this is the best pumpkin ever, grandma!

WITH MY SISTERS

2009-08-17T18:58:00.000-07:00

The summer morning is perfect

arriving from near and far

sisters of all ages, fill the Mission Plaza

with colors and laughter....

Sisters hugging and smiling

setting up their booths and sharing their art.

The sound of the drums in the air

the smell of coffee and chocolate buns,

young girls running around with

colorful painted faces

and volunteers in bright yellow shirts

like sunflowers

helping everyone..

Day with Creative Women

music, art, poetry, fun

and sisterhood

I sit under the ancient eucaliptus trees

and listen to the Mission bells ring,

a bride like a fairy in white walks on the lawn

and we smile to each other

both happy, both surrounded with joy

I look around and see my sisters

laughing, sharing, dancing,

all is well, all is peace.

Sonia Paz Baronvine

REMEMBERING GIOVANNI

2009-04-06T22:04:00.000-07:00

Today your tired body is finally resting
and your soul is free at last
to soar the firmament
and glide over that sea
you loved so much....

All of us are silent
lost for words
sad to have lost you
missing you already....

Remembering you
your tender voice
and that smile
we will never forget...

Sweet Giovanni
my old friend
of summer days
filled with joy
sunsets among friends
nights filled with music
under the stars.....

We were so young
and had so many plans
life brought you fame
and you shone like a star
you were a light
in the dark to many......

A good husband
a good dad
yours was a happy family
magic was all around....

We will remember you
and your life
we will continue your work
and your dreams....

Your spirit now is along angels
and someday
my sweet brother
among the clouds
we will meet again.....

Sonia Paz Baron-Vine
Copyright 2009

FABIOLA

2009-02-09T19:02:00.001-08:00

FABIOLA
Dedicated to Human Rights Activist
Fabiola Letelier del Solar

When the dark clouds of tyranny fell all around you
when the evil hands silenced your brave brother
when innocent men and women disappeared in the night
and nobody knew where they were taken
when it was easy to look the other way and be safe
you stood up alone against injustice,
your voice spoke of truth and liberty

Looking at the face of the assassins you stood strong
and you were the voice of the missing ones,
those who were voiceless, lost in the fog of terror,
you never forgot them, you made their memories
your crusade.

Brave Fabiola, an example to women everywhere
a mother, a lawyer, a freedom fighter, a feminist
brave woman, solidarity is your motto,
The tortured ones, the political prisoners, the forgotten ones
you fought for their liberty and dignity, you alone
gave years of struggle and dedication..

I admire you, I salute you.

Copyright © 2009

Sonia Paz Baronvine

GOODBYE JULIN

2008-08-07T01:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I learned you are gone

that your colorful house is dark now

that I will never see your smile again

you took the sunset trail

following the first night's star...

Can you hear me from far away

if I stand under the stars and

call your name?

Can you recognizme now that

I am old?

Only memories of those summers

remain, when we laughed and sang

sitting by the sea.

Goodbye Julin my sweet friend

I will go visit you soon

I'll seat on lover's beach

and I will caress the sand

where you now sleep...

Sonia Paz Baronvine

SISTERHOOD

2008-06-10T01:28:00.000-07:00

We arrive from near and far

smiling, hugging and laughing

happy to see each other

Every year under the sycamores

by the creek we meet

bringing our creations

sharing our art

Creative women we all are

our hands magical tools

our voices sweet melodies

our words pure poetry

A day with creative women

our banner announces

and the young girls

walk among our art

with bright eyes

filled with wonder

And the old sisters

visit us with tenderness

happy to see our unity

blessing us with smiles

Welcome sisters

old and new

here we meet again

to show our art,

to make new friends

to sing along

the ancient

song of sisterhood

Sonia Paz Baronvine

"YOU HAVE ARRIVED"

2008-04-10T18:50:00.001-07:00

On an April day

on a Spring day

High on the snowed mountains

of South Lake Tahoe

near Emerald Bay

you arrived...

My grandson

wanted and waited for

your big blue eyes

search for the light

and your little hands

clasp grandma's pinky

Little sweet boy

you arrived in a day

when the birds

were arriving home

after a long trip

across the planet

As they sang happily

on the branches

safe in their blue lake

so you are safe in the

arms of your grandma

Sonia Paz Baronvine

POEM FOR MY GRANDSON JOSHUA

2008-02-15T16:39:00.000-08:00

In the silence of space
while the planet softly spin among a sea of stars
you float in my daughter's womb
in your warm golden refuge....

Soon my little one
you will see your grandma
who waits fo you.....

She will take you to see the ocean
tell you legends of her far away land
teach you to sing with the wind
and dance under the rain....

Soon my little one
you will smell the flowers
and dip your feet in the creek
while the fairies and trees look down on us.....

Soon little one,
you will sleep in my arms
under the moonlight.....

Sonia Paz Baronvine

ANOTHER CHRISTMAS

2008-01-14T23:53:00.000-08:00

Hanging the lights on the tree, my home smells like Christmas

the pine branches loaded with ornaments filled with memories

Seems like it was Christmas just a while ago but no, a year has passed and here I am decorating the manger..

Few figures are left after all these years perhaps the most important ones are left

the angel, the sacred family and a little lamb...

I turn off the lights and look at the lighted tree it shines,

it looks nice and I smile...

Another Christmas, presents, family and joy...

grandchildren to tell the story

of the wise men and the little star...

Goodbye Darling

2008-01-14T23:49:00.000-08:00

You spent your last night next to me I nursed you trying to stop the pain

but your crying told me how much it hurt.....

Tati and I gave you meds we sang you lullabies

but only my petting stopped you from crying,

you lay on your little blue bed, you were so sick....

My little Darling, after seventeen years your time has come to say bye bye

I gave you a bath, the warm water seem to help a bit,

but I could see that you couldn't move anymore...

I cried as I dried you, so thin and frail...

my little darling finally in the morning you slept but by nine

you were crying again and I knew....

We drove you to the vet and she gave you a shot

you went quiet, as we caressed you Dima, Tati and I around you

all of us crying, and you so tiny so small..

with your little black eyes going dim and

at eleven you gave two little breaths and you were gone....

Little Luke

2008-01-14T23:46:00.000-08:00

Little Luke, so cute with those brilliant eyes and that lovely smile...

Do you know little Luke that I feel I am your special grandma?

I feel your sweet mommy as my daughter and I am so proud of her..

Someday I will hug you and show you pictures of your mommy when she was a little girl....

Until then little Luke I am sending you hugs and kisses...

Grandma Pachi

Little Laust

2008-01-14T23:43:00.000-08:00

Little boy Laust with brilliant eyes and a sweet smile.....

You have brought joy to so many in your home and around the world....

I am your faraway grandma and I hope someday to hold you in my arms...

Tell you stories about your sweet mom whom is my Danish daughter, and holding your little hand show you the wonders of my land.....

Laust, your name means free and I see a brilliant future waiting for you....

Little Laust sweet little innocent boy from accross the sea my good wishes sail

over the waves to you.....

GOING ALONE....

2008-01-14T23:41:00.000-08:00

Along the beach wetting my feet in the cool sea, going alone....

Enjoying myself rested and calm ,no worries no deadlines, going alone....

Sunset

2008-01-14T23:39:00.000-08:00

Listening to sax I drink a glass of wine and look at the sunset....

The clouds are red pink and orange and my wine changes color.....

A peaceful sunset, the sea is calm and the sound of the sax softly accompany the piano,

A perfect end of the day.....

A baby it's on the way

2008-01-14T23:36:00.000-08:00

My daughter gave me a call, mom I think I am pregnant again!

I am so happy I am going to be a grandma a second time!!!

Would it be another little boy?

Would it be a litte girl?

No matter, I am so excited!!!"

A little walk in the woods...

2008-01-14T23:33:00.000-08:00

I walk along the country road it is autumn and the rain washed the leaves clean....

The scent of the earth, of flowers, of rain fills my lungs I am happy...

The sound of my steps is all I hear, still not too cold yet

just a perfect day for a little walk in the woods...

Playing with Zak

2008-01-14T23:31:00.000-08:00

I laugh as my grandson runs with his little feet,

fast trying to keep the kite from falling down....

He yells look, grandma Pachi look!

And his eyes shine full of joy.....

I yell back go Zack go!

And we laugh and run together as the kite flies....

Playing my guitar

2008-01-14T23:28:00.000-08:00

Sitting on the rocks playing my guitar while the sun goes down....

My favorite time of the day, when the light is golden and you can look at the sun......

Moonlight

2008-01-14T23:26:00.000-08:00

The night arrived and the moon came out to shine over the palm tree....

The cool sand under my feet as I walk along the beach.....

A soft breeze plays with my hair and I follow the lights of the club at the end of the beach... Music fills the air and happy friends wave welcoming me.....

Sunset in the tropics

2008-01-14T23:23:00.000-08:00

Far away from home I sit on a pier looking at the sunset.....

The warmth of the evening envelops me stars are appearing in the sky.....

And the red sun slowly goes down to sleep at the end of the day....

Message in a bottle

2008-01-14T23:17:00.000-08:00

I wrote a message and placed it in a bottle

I took it to the sea and send it floating away.....

Someone will see it someday and will let me know...

I wonder how far my message will travel accross the sea....

Tropical sea...

2008-01-14T23:14:00.000-08:00

Resting against the palm tree looking at a tropical sea....

A pink shell on the white sand the clear sea bathing her....

I will paint a watercolor tomorrow morning....

I think I can....

I love the freedom of these lazy days, with my toes in the warm sand....

On vacation...

2008-01-14T23:10:00.000-08:00

My friend called let's go on vacation she said...

And so we did, took a plane and landed in a sunny island....

Eating under a palapa dancing until late laughing like old times....

Here we go singing under the sun like two little girls my friend Katerina and I.....

Relaxing days....

2008-01-14T23:06:00.000-08:00

By the lake on the little pier reading in the afternoon among nature, in peace

I have earned my rest, nobody to tell me what to do, where to go, when to be back,

it is great......

Finally free...

2008-01-14T23:02:00.000-08:00

I am finally free, free to laugh, free to listen to my music,

free to smoke, free to drink, free to stay up late, free to invite friends,

free to cook anything I choose, free to change the tv channel, free to sleep late,

free to spend, free to call, and talk, talk, talk, free to go out with friends,

free to take care of me, and me, and me, and me...

Mean old man...

2008-01-14T22:58:00.000-08:00

You are a mean old man, alone and petty, cranky and selfish...

And I tried to change you, I tried to show you, that I had good friends,

and that you could join us....

But you were mean and stepped on my ideas, my plans and crashed it all....

Looking at the sea...

2008-01-14T22:55:00.000-08:00

One of those precious days of summer's end, when we realize how fast it went away....

Few days I really spent at the beach and here I am again looking at the sea,

this time looking like the grandma I am...

Years that I do not wear a bikini, even a hat I wear now ....

no matter.. my days in the sun are gone now

but what days they were!!!!.

Under the moonlight....

2008-01-14T22:52:00.000-08:00

It is summer and the sea is calm ....

the moonlight creates a trail over the waves.....

Weaving with it's silver and blue shades guides my sight towards the horizon.....

Under the moonlight lovers walk on the sand holding hands....

All is peace....

Your voice in the wind...

2008-01-14T22:48:00.000-08:00

I hear your voice in the wind, I know it is just my imagination but I do...

The wind blows all around me and the gray clouds are crying

like my heart they are sad and heavy...

You do not need me anymore and it hurts, oh, how it hurts...

Confusion and anguish in my life..

missing you daily, alone in the multitudes the noise surrounds me

and inside the silence of this pain...

Your sweet voice....

2008-01-14T22:45:00.000-08:00

In the darkness of my room I hear your sweet voice on the telephone...

We are so far away yet so close.. I hear the sweet words coming from your heart..

I am longing to be in your arms to taste your lips and to feel your love..

Very soon we will be together and I will look into those blue eyes of yours..

and caress that blond hair I love so much...

Hurry lover I am wanting you come and whisper in my ear

and let me sleep in your arms....

Your Eyes

2008-01-14T22:43:00.000-08:00

I like to gaze into your eyes, they have the color of the sea..

And I read them when you re happy, when you are sad and when they show love....

I kiss them and they smile at me tenderly...

Young lover...

2008-01-14T22:36:00.000-08:00

Age does not matter..you said and I felt wanted ...

Much younger you were, and your youth brought me back in time

I held you close as you drove fast on your motorcycle...

my hair in the wind and you laughing...

I had forgotten how good it felt, to dance to be swirled to the music and to feel young again ...

And our lovemaking, your young skin next to mine, drenching me in passion possessing me

so intense.....

My sweet young lover, I look forward to being with you,

make me smile, make me love, bring your sweet caresses,

and take me..adore me

You surprise me

2008-01-14T22:22:00.000-08:00

You surprise me every day when you call me,

and leave those sweet messages,

when you bring me roses from your garden,

the plans you make for us, the places you take me,

holding my hand and the smile your give me,

when you see me each time...

so tall, so strong so beautiful,

yet so tender and sweet to me....

You miss me

2008-01-14T22:19:00.000-08:00

I got your message....

you ask when I will spend the night with you,

you miss me and I feel wanted and needed ...

I have missed you too and it makes me happy,

to know that you need me my sweet tender love....

tonight I will be in your arms

You came to me in a dream.....

2008-01-14T22:10:00.000-08:00

I was a sleep and you came to me in a dream
you were sick I saw it, but still, you hugged me
I looked into your eyes they were green like the sea,
and your eye lashes were long, so close you were to me
and even though I did not know you I stayed by your side...
It was a strange place, you were coming from a trip carrying
all your clothes one on top of the other I looked at your white pants
they had blood in them ...
A young woman asked me to dance and without music I did,
suddenly you were gone and I searched for you...
There were people around and I took a baby out of a stroller
she was sitting in water... I was fixing her hat when this famous
movie star came to tell me you had died playing the guitar...
She said he died playing "carrera" he was doctor you know ..
Who were you?
Sweet stranger who held me, kissed me and looked into my eyes?

Copyright 2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Broken Heart

2008-01-14T22:06:00.000-08:00

Why did it happen?

why did it even start?

I trusted in you, but you broke my heart..

Why didn't I suspect anything, how could I have been so blind ?

Maybe it was because you acted so kind..

The hurt I am feeling now is not easy to heal,

you said you loved me, but that is not what I feel....

No more wishing for the past, it was not meant to be,

it didn't seem to last....

So I have to forget about you and me....

You are near

2008-01-14T22:02:00.000-08:00

I passed by the airport today and I saw your plane there,

it means you are in town, you are near but you do not need me and it hurts,

no phone calls, no messages nothing to tell me you miss me and

I have to fight this urge to contact you and tell you how much I miss you....

As I drive by the beach I know you are near, sailing around the bay with a new companion...

Like we used to do in happy times, my heart feels heavy, and I drive by in a daze..

Memories come flushing and I wonder where did we go wrong and I wish

I could fix things so we could be happy again....

With you

2008-01-14T14:02:00.000-08:00

In your arms gazing into your green eyes warm and safe, while you caress my face...

I want to be here for ever like this, with the peace you give me, the tenderness you bring me... my head on the pillow, fascinated with your features, those lips I adore, your sweet voice..

my love, the intimacy of this moment is magical...

I let you in my body face to face..

kissing you and I know this is true love...

Never leave, always be like this. I will stay with you forever..

Winter memories

2008-01-14T14:00:00.000-08:00

I remember vast valleys, rolling hills covered with snow shimmering in the sunlight

winding roads taking me uphill with icicles sparkling everywhere

old pine trees covered with snow and the silence of the dawn

Small pink tulips..appearing here and there like sign that the Spring was near,

slowly melting the ice...

The crystal falling delicately in my hands, magic perfect snowflakes fathers winter's gift to me walking slowly on the snow in the quiet of the forest, sliding downhill with the sunset, peaceful and gentle winter memories of snowballs and angel wings...

White roses...

2008-01-14T13:57:00.000-08:00

There you stood, so tall and handsome, smiling at me, holding white roses

you took them from your garden specially for me, so sweet and tender

I smelled their fragance and smiled at you, grateful and touched by your thoughfulness

you surprised me, each time we see

I am getting to know you and I like what I see

Sweet and caring, giving of yourself slowly and carefully

I will wait, I have no hurry I am fascinated by you

and I feel our future will be as sweet as these white roses.

Where did it go....?

2008-01-14T13:54:00.000-08:00

You came into my world and held me.. I kissed you...

But deep within your heart you live in solitude...

I never saw you cry I wonder if you are strong did you ever feel pain?

Now when I remember the words you never said, those eyes of sea that gaze at me in silence where did it go that tenderness, those smiles your caresses?

You never knew I did loved you and I would have made you happy

Where are you?

2008-01-14T13:51:00.000-08:00

Forty years have passed...

Were you applauding in some concert? were you among the multitude?

have we crossed in some airport? were you next to me in an elevator?

did your eyes gazed at my face in the magazine covers?

did you listened to my voice on the radio? did you dream with me one winter night?

did you see me dance at a party? did we waited together at the bank?

did you watch me swim at the beach? where are you my love?

I am getting old, and I need you so much, I am so alone I want to gaze into your eyes

see your smile, hear your voice saying you love me,that I will never be sad again,

that you will kiss my tears that you will let me die in your arms...

Rejection

2008-01-14T13:49:00.000-08:00

Silence all around me, time to think and ponder, reality is brutally clear now that you are not here..

Memories do not alleviate, the cruel and blunt present, your silence tells more than words,

no need for explanations...

Rejection hurts deep inside and confusion brings despair, my mind tells me to forget,

but my heart keeps on lingering..

I see you everywhere, I hear your voice and turn around, but each time I'm remainded

that is just a mirage I create to compensate, to cope when you are not here..

Waves in the twilight...

2008-01-14T13:45:00.000-08:00

Side by side we stood in the silence on the pier, looking at the waves as they passed under us.. Looking at them break, listening to their magical sound, we smiled at each other...

Watching the sunset on a warm calm dusk...

You and I, good friends and lovers sharing the magic..

Sitting with our feet hanging over the sea, looking at the sailboats no words needed ..

The twilight arrived, the hills profiled against the first stars, the light house shone and we held hands ..

I showed you the surf under the moonlight and we witness the city come alive with lights...

Amazon

2008-01-14T13:41:00.000-08:00

Going south to the green land of the amazon, a canoe takes me deep into the jungle...

Green leaves reach down to the water, the afternoon sun filters through the canopy and the sound of the colorful birds reaches me in their singing glory...

Shining wet turtles along the shore sleeping reptiles and dark insects, their eyes follow my canoe as I glide silently under the trees...

Wild orchids sway in the breeze, moist with the spray of a waterfall, that like a veil gently falls against the shinning rocks, making them glow under the sun like gems...

I walk barefoot and the moss feels cool and moist between my toes...

A blue and yellow butterfly lands on my shoulder as I kneel in this moist and sacred land....

Waiting for love...

2008-01-14T13:38:00.000-08:00

Since I kissed for the first time I have been in love with love

and here I am again. wishing for love to come into my heart.

I live for love, I miss it's warmth the happiness I feel when his loving arms embrace me

All my life I have searched for the love of my life, for that special one, yet to be found Somewhere in this world he is waiting for me, for my kiss and my passion...

I feel it, oh my love, come to me soon I need you so much, hold me at night and let me sleep

in your warm embrace...

And kiss me, kiss me like I have dreamed for so long ...

I am calling you, love this thorn in my heart aches, come and take it away.

Unfounded fears

2008-01-14T13:35:00.000-08:00

Wrapped in your arms I used to gaze into your eyes...
I felt safe in our love, and I adored you...
You caressed me like no other and I loved to feel your hands playing with my hair...
Holding my face and kissing me so softly like only you could do...
But all my dreams died yesterday I broke them, with unfounded fears...
I cried feeling so sorry remembering our love...
all night you were on my mind and today, I dropped my pride and reached for you...
And there you were, waiting for me... with love and tenderness and all is forgotten,
we are one as we should, once again lovers and friends...

Copyright ©2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Under the pier

2008-01-14T13:32:00.000-08:00

We walked on the sand holding hands I followed you under the stars...

the surf shined under the moonlight and we stood side by side in silence...

once in a while you touched me and I rested my head on your shoulder...

I followed you next to the sea and we walked along the shore....

Under the pier we stood, you behind me, so tall and strong and yet so tender...

resting my head in your chest surrendering to your embrace...

A magical moment watching the waves, both of us in the night under the pier...

Under the starry night

2008-01-14T13:29:00.000-08:00

(For Michael)

Sitting here in the warm water, being held in your strong arms ...

I feel safe and happy my love...

You kiss my neck and we laugh alone just the two of us under the starry night...

I love your voice and what you say, those loving words..

just for me and I know you love me like I do. ...

A shooting star passes by and we both see it we make a wish...

and hope that it will come true.

That you and I will always be like this.

This distance

2008-01-14T13:26:00.000-08:00

I look at the hills that separate us, and I wonder if you think of me....

all day your image has been on my mind, the raindrops hit hard the crystals of my window pane, you are not here anymore, and you will not return..

This distance is tearing me slowly to pieces, I cry these hot tears and I miss you so much..

It is hard to fight this impossible, there is nothing I can do, your love for me has died

and I cannot revive it...

I wish I could run and hide in your arms once more..

Perfect kiss

2008-01-14T13:23:00.000-08:00

Under the full moon I came, from under the warm waters to see your loving eyes waiting for me...

I stood there in silence smiling at you, naked under the moonlight...

Magical moment, no words needed, only our eyes locked and both of us smiling...

You moved slowly towards me, both of us in the water, our bodies almost touching...

steam floated from my skin and I closed my eyes..

You held my face in your hands and gently so gently, gave me the perfect kiss....

The little ones

2008-01-14T13:19:00.000-08:00

If we could hear them, if we could see our world through their eyes ...

In every corner of this planet the little ones know...

They cry silent tears as they see the violence, the famine the drugs, the greed, the pollution... They wonder why we have gone so wrong, changing our planet into a greedy chaos, into turmoil

If we could open our hearts, put aside our differences and reach out to each other without fear...we could again live in a gentle world, sharing and building a kinder tomorrow for the little ones...

So they can play in peace, their laughter breaking the walls we have built, the walls that keep us apart....

The harbor lights

2008-01-14T13:15:00.000-08:00

(To Valparaiso)

The harbor lights shining in the distance as I glide my sailboat in the dark ...

the wind rings my copper bell and the sound of the seagulls tells me I am home again....

Last night in the nocturnal fog I anticipated this sight...

And now like million stars the street light above the harbor, zig zag up the hill like the trail of a drunken wizard...

I am entering my harbor, and the reflections on the water give me many trails to follow...

but I know the one to take..

The one that brings me home to you...

The fading dream

2008-01-14T13:11:00.000-08:00

Your silence speaks more than words...

I have not heard from you in days, I understand that you do not need me...

and that I need to go on alone...

I hurt inside and I feel sad....

the many moments we shared, the smiles and the kisses, those happy loving days..

now all those things are gone and I am here all alone, wondering what went wrong...

The rain outside falls and my heart aches for you...

I will have to be strong as I see my dream fade away...

I will miss your smile...

Teaser

2008-01-14T13:07:00.000-08:00

So, you play with my mind and tempt me with your love

only to pull back and dissapear..

How cruel, these games and I fall for them each time, thinking you have changed

But no, you are the same, a coward in love matters, afraid of commitment and sincerity

Much easier for you to flirt and tease, than to love and trust

And here again I wonder will the next time be for real..?

Sweet smile

2008-01-14T13:03:00.000-08:00

The first time I saw you... you gave me a sweet smile and even though we did not say,

I felt you were telling me, you wanted me...

Each time we saw since then, I felt the same unspoken message in your smile..

you wanted me...

Last night we spoke, and again your sweet smile said to me what your lips did not..

Your hands touched me softly, I wanted to hold you, but I kept still...

I am anticipating the moment when you and I decide it is time...

when our lips will tell the words we want to say..

I know that when we give our love without words ,all I will need is your sweet smile..

Standing in the rain

2008-01-14T12:50:00.000-08:00

Outside, looking at the pines under the rain that gently falls, thinking of you...

in the mist a lonely hummingbird flies around me curiously..

I stand alone under the gray clouds that move towards your hometown..

distant thunder reaches me and I see the glow of lightning over the hills that separate us..

The wind caresses my hair and the raindrops mix with my tears...

are you in the rain that kisses my lips and the wind that embraces me?

How I miss you..love.

Solitude

2008-01-14T12:47:00.000-08:00

I have searched for so long, that when a little of it I have found, I have cherished every moment.. and died a little when it was gone...
Solitude finds me, my old friend always near, to talk to you is easy, to cry with you innate..
here once more, looking into the distance, feeling this emptiness, this yearning...
I have reached the golden years and I still have not found those eyes I have been seeking
and thought once I found..
Solitude, my old friend I am sure you know him, bring him to me, guide his gaze, carry him in your tender arms and let me fall into his...

Copyright ©2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Sisters

2008-01-14T12:42:00.000-08:00

Like this, holding hands facing the sun, smiling, united...

Our hair free in the wind gazing a wonderful horizon....

Advancing joyfully, confident, supporting each other...

magical creatures, all different all beautiful, all special, filled with tenderness...

Our voices a melody, our hands a chain, sisters forever, daughters of mother nature,

nieces of Pachamama, brides of the sun...

Grandmothers, mothers, aunts, daughters, all capable, all queens, let's go ahead,

filled with light to spread our sweetness, to share our hearts.

Silent witness

2008-01-14T12:36:00.000-08:00

(To Frank)

Sailing by your side under the warm sun of the afternoon, laughing and carefree...

I let you enter my heart, looking into your blue eyes, caressing your curly hair...

I kissed your lips and dreamed in your arms...

The stars were silent witness to the tenderness we felt, the magic we created and the closeness we gave...

Now the sun shines and you are not here, my heart aches for the truth..

I wish I was like the sand kissed by your tide...

But the waves took you away to kiss another sand

Shimmering Lights

2008-01-14T12:32:00.000-08:00

Together you and I like a dreamed so many times, gliding softly over the waves ...

pushed by the gentle afternoon wind ...

Shimmering lights you and I, following the sparkling reflection of the sun..

Your arms around me, your warmth behind me...

the wind fills the sails and I rest my head on your shoulder...

I navigate following the sunny trail and your voice softly encourages me...

Sunset arrives and the harbor lits....

you call me to your side and I sit next to you, as nana's blanket covers our shivering bodies..

The starry sky, the sound of the distant seals, we kiss as we rock gently in the night,,,

Shelter

2008-01-14T12:29:00.000-08:00

Alone and hurt, crying in the night I came..

you held me in your arms and let me sob..

the warmth and love I felt, the refuge I found...

my sisters understood and I slept safe, healing my wounds in dignity and peace..

A small garden where flowers bloom and the cement walkway with the imprints...

of other mothers and children's hands before me ...

A safe home away from pain, where I can start my life again...

Secret Dreams

2008-01-14T12:26:00.000-08:00

For so long I had this dream deep in my soul, a secret dream...

Nobody knew, I never told, I kept it inside protected, mine..

And then you came and surprised me, by doing all those things I had dreamed for so long..

You held me just right and kissed me just so, and your eyes seemed to know..

I held you so tight and clinged to you, in the silence, needing no words just us both...

I want this to be true, I do not want it to end

I am leaving you in charge

I will wait and follow

Do not brake this magical spell....

Sailing Away

2008-01-14T12:23:00.000-08:00

I want to sail away with you by my side smiling..

with your arms around me looking together at the open sea..

with the wind pushing our sails and the sun shinning along our sailboat..

Your sweet voice telling me that you love me as I close my eyes, safe in the knowledge of our love ....

sailing away with you my love....

sailing forever..

Sad Eyes

2008-01-14T12:20:00.000-08:00

You look at me and I see your green eyes...

today they are troubled and I do not know why..

I see your sad eyes and I am worried...

have I done something to cause you pain.. ?

My sweet love do not be sad, I love you so..

Hold my hand and walk with me, lets face life together and trust in each other

I will stand by your side no matter what...

have faith in our love and show me your smiling eyes again...

Running in this fog..

2008-01-14T12:16:00.000-08:00

You were my sun and my moon, I was your stars and your dew...
now you are my storm and my thunder, and I am running in this fog..
I cuddled in your arms and we looked at the stars ...
I felt your warm lips on my face and your hands on my hair..
We laughed and held close, watched the sunset and kissed,
I closed my eyes and dreamed warm and safe in your embrace...
now it is cold and raining, I drift alone in the wind, the lightning scares me,
and I am running in this fog..
Listening to my heartbeat, I heard you say I was magical ...
tears cloud my eyes and I am running in this fog..

Copyright 2000 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Remembering you...

2008-01-14T12:12:00.000-08:00

Here I am, remembering you....
it is late, and alone I listen to music and remember you..
Listen to my call in the night, I wished on a star tonight that you will call and tell me that you love me again..
I remember the first stolen kiss, your smile and your sweet voice saying that you couldn't resist, your warm embrace...
the sun has gone to sleep, words are silent now,I was in love with you I miss you so much...
I have left you fly away and I have sailed away from you, but I remember you still ,every night... I miss your scent, the softness of your skin, the passion that we felt..

Copyright ©2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine "

Regret

2008-01-14T12:07:00.000-08:00

I was dissapointed, even though it felt good at times..

I was left with a sad feeling in my heart..

we should not have done it, I kept telling myself

after the fact...

Too late to mend the broken spell..

We left our lust guide us, without thinking of the consequenses,without thinking..

And now I regret, so much so.. it was not worth it and I risked breaking someone's heart...

Only time will tell, if he ever knew that I played with fire...

He was on my mind and I kept comparing, the passion was not there, the love was not there, nothing was there..

Good lesson to learn and never repeat..

Lust is an illusion without love..... merciles...

I regret, oh I regret....

Reflections

2008-01-14T12:01:00.000-08:00

Soft sounds my tears make, as they land on my blank page....

I see them fall and glow for an instant in the sunlight...

I see my reflection in them and they are absorbed before I can capture the scene. Warm and soft they fall, what rhythm do they follow?

my heartbeat or my breathing..?

Clear drops, shinning in the sun, filled with my sorrow and my foes

I let them ran, I let them fall, they are tiny pieces of my heart shattering in front of me..

My reflection, no need to seek, I know those sad eyes and their distant gaze..

I taste my salty tears as I kiss them goodbye..

Reborn

2008-01-14T11:57:00.000-08:00

(To Tati )

So long ago you were taken away....

for years I cried and missed you so, but life is a circle and you are back

and I can hold you again in my arms, my daughter, my little fairie my golden pixie,

I love you so,

You have grown and are taller than me, but when you are asleep I can still see the little girl

that clinged to my arms and asked me to dance with her...

Tatiana , my baby my little girl now a lovely young teen, welcome back into my life

welcome back into my heart..

Rage

2008-01-14T11:55:00.000-08:00

It burns inside of me, tearing my broken heart to incandescent pieces..

I close my eyes and I see your false smile, your lying eyes and I hear your deceiving voice..

I breathe and it hurts, missing you makes me get mad at myself...

I know you played me like a virtuoso and I played your music...

I am angry at you, at your lies and betrayal,

no honor, no truth only a facade..

nothing more...

Pink Clouds

2008-01-14T11:51:00.000-08:00

(To Dad )

I got the sad news on my machine...

Mom's voice weak and frail, saying Dad had died last night...

I sat alone in my room, in silence and played the message over and over, still not believing these bad news were real..

I took the plane home and flew south, it was sunset the sky was blue and I thought of Dad,

who was a pilot and how he loved to fly.

Now his soul was soaring the sky, free as comet among the stars...

and there along me in the pink clouds for sure...

Peace

2008-01-14T11:48:00.000-08:00

Dawn arrives...
I hear the birds greeting the sun and I see dew drops glistening over the wildflowers....
A couple of mellow swans glide over the lake while a deer walk silently among the pines descending to drink....
Squirrels run up and down the branches and the ferns move in the gentle breeze...
I feel blessed, I close my eyes and let the warmth of the morning sun embrace me,
as I listen to nature all around me...
this is peace....

Copyright ©2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Our secret garden

2008-01-14T11:45:00.000-08:00

We sit and smile, happy to be together here in this lovely place, our secret garden..

The bonsai and ferns surrounds us, the air is fresh and the sound of birds reaches us..

You showed me this magical quiet place and we come here to be alone and talk...

I am enjoying getting to know you, we can talk and smile, there is peace between us....

Our secret dream

2008-01-14T11:42:00.000-08:00

I held your hand in the dark and you guided me down the sandy road
stopping to close my jacket.. it was cold.
Under the starry night I leaned against you, while you held me in the silence of the night
We stood like that for a long time looking at the beautiful night sky and you pointed at Venus and Mars
The frogs were singing as I sat on your lap... we listened to their mating song and I turned to you, the moonlight was reflected in your eyes and we kissed under the stars..

Copyright ©2007 Sonia Paz Baron-Vine

Our Dawn

2008-01-14T11:39:00.000-08:00

Softly I turn and see you still sleeping by my side

I like to watch you like this, naked next to me...

Our bed still warm from love, my body remembers our passion, the night kisses and the soft whispers of love...

I caress your shoulders counting those freckles I adore, you smile and your eyes open..

I kiss you and you embrace me..

Our love surrounds us and I feel your passion...

it is dawn and you are loving me...

Only you

2008-01-14T11:36:00.000-08:00

I think of you, remembering your skin, your kisses, your smile..

I close my eyes and I see your green eyes, looking at me with that intensity I adore...

Your hands that know my skin, those lips that know how to kiss me...

Only you in my heart, only you in my mind, only you in my skin...

Only the wind

2008-01-14T11:32:00.000-08:00

Only the wind, shifting the Arab sand over the ruins caused by war...

Only the wind, lifting the African dust over the graves, caused by AIDS...

Only the wind, over the mud in Argentina's pampas caused by hunger...

Only the wind, howling through Appalachian winter caused by poverty...

Only the wind, of truth and hope can make a difference caused by each of us..

The storm you brought

2008-01-14T11:28:00.000-08:00

I gave my broken heart permission to be touched, trusted my injured dreams to sail along yours and you said..I am an honest man... and I believed you..

I surrender to your kiss and slept in your arms...

like a child I was happy at your side, it seemed like you were the one I had dreamed of..

I told myself..trust again, unless you do..you will never know..

Your eyes seemed so kind, I fell so softly into love's trap that I did not see the danger...

now your silence cuts my heart, it hurts deep inside, my dreams have sunked in the storm you brought...

Once upon a summertime

2008-01-14T11:25:00.000-08:00

We walked quietly side by side with the tide kissing our feet...

Those warm evenings, when the first star appeared over the hills and the sand shone, kissed by the sunset...

You caressed me tenderly and I smiled peacefully.. we sat holding hands and looked at the moonlight's trail over the sea...

Once upon a summertime I felt your tender love and we laughed carefree...

life was good then....

Oh...love's touch

2008-01-14T11:21:00.000-08:00

There I was..sad and lonely tears fell from my tired eyes and my heart ached for love..

I was waiting for love's soft touch, longing to sleep in his arms again, to kiss his lips and caress his face.. At night I wished upon a star to bring sweet love to me so I could fall asleep in his warmth and bathe in his tenderness... I waited so long for your touch, that now, when I know you are near and you have finally arrived I feel warm all over and full of hope that this time is the final one...

Nothing but fun

2008-01-14T03:06:00.000-08:00

We talked and felt sure we could do it, nothing but fun, we agreed, and we went ahead boldly... And we kissed and hugged we gazed into each other under the soft glow of candlelight..

And we had sex, no love involved nothing but fun, as agreed..

And we laughed and drank to drown the emptiness and guilt we felt..

Both of us with our bodies there but our hearts somewhere else..

A good bye kiss for luck and a sad smile under the morning sun

Keep the secret we said and walked away having had nothing but fun...

Nobody Compares

2008-01-14T03:03:00.000-08:00

So you write to me again and I feel happy just to know that you are thinking of me ..

I have missed you so and all the others, the ones I tried to forget you with, dissapear..

I get this feeling in my heart wanting to run to you and hide in your embrace

Has been so long since I have felt your lips kissing me and your hands caressing me

my sweet love, how long do I must wait?

I want you next to me soon, nobody compares to you nobody makes me happy, like you

Are you coming back? I need to know...

My sweet child

2008-01-14T03:00:00.000-08:00

(To Jason )

Seeing you there lying in your hospital bed breakes my heart, your chestnut eyes, filled with fear, your lovely face swollen, the pain of your injury like a dagger hurting you constantly

As you look at me helpless I wish I had a magical wand, to touch your auburn hair and give you peace and see you smile again

Oh, my son, my sweet child how cruel the pain that mother's feel, when their children hurt

You are a young man now and I see how your body fills the bed, I see you still as my little boy, my sweet child what can I do to help?

Tell you I love you? that I will always be here, that your pain is my pain, that I would gladly take your place, so you can be pain free again?

My son

2008-01-14T02:57:00.000-08:00

(To Jason Alan)

As you lie in your hospital bed I look at you and in silence I pray

pray so you will open your chestnut eyes again and smile at me once more..

My sweet child, I am so sad to see you hurting, it breaks my heart to see you suffering like this

I wish I could do more, to help you get better..

I hold your hand and I feel the fever raging in your body outside the wind of Autumn howls and dark clouds announce the rain to come

My sweet child, as you sleep I pray the sound of your breathing breaks the silence of your room, I caress your auburn hair and kiss your forehead my son, your guardian angel is beside you I feel his presence as I pray... will both be here, when you awake

My Grandson

2008-01-14T02:54:00.000-08:00

In the silence of the room my heart skips a bit my grandson is being born...

From my baby's womb after all night and all day comes this new magical being

his small hands grasping the air his sweet voice filling the room...

Through tears of joy, I kiss my daughter my brave baby... silently thanking God for this blessing, for this baby boy who has brought love and goodness to us all...

An so... here you are Zachary Tyler as you open your eyes...

all you see is grandma loving smile

My love song for you..

2008-01-14T02:52:00.000-08:00

"My love, my sweet love I found you at last..

All the others are forgotten now that I found your sweet embrace I do not need anything else.. In the silence of our love your image in my eyes the love I waited so long for has arrive at last

I am yours and you are mine I am your moon and you are my sun and the stars are shinning only for us I sing for you alone and you smile at me this is my song for you my love song for you

My little angels

2008-01-14T02:50:00.000-08:00

God blessed me with three healthy children and I promised God to thank him in a special way

I adopted three disable children and loved them just the same

My sweet Nikita with those sparkling blue eyes my lovely Tatiana magical golden fairy and my little Dimitri with a wonderful smile

Life has been kind I have been blessed to hear them laugh and see them grow happy and safe They are my little angels my blessing, my treasure

My faraway land

2008-01-14T02:43:00.000-08:00

In a far away land where in the desert the stars at night glow like diamonds

and the blue sea shines like a saphire, there is a flower red like a ruby that blooms at night...

In that far away land the hills are green like emeralds and the snow capped mountains shine

like pearls.... The valleys are embroidered with vineyards and the grapes hang like topazes under the sun, honey and milk are plentiful and the beaches hide in their golden sand treasures of multicolor agates..

Crystal clear lakes, and majestic snow capped volcanoes glow like amethysts in the sunset light. white water rivers fall from the high peaks in thousand waterfalls.

And the blue sky where condors soar contrasts against the dew kissed ferns gifts of the green rain forest.